"For you created my inmost being;

you knit me together in my mother’s womb.

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

My frame was not hidden from you when I was made

in the secret place, when I was woven together

in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my

unformed body; all the days ordained for me

were written in your book

before one of them came to be."

Psalm 139: 13-16

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

The countdown begins!

After all this waiting in less than 24 hours we will hopefully have Miss Meghan in our arms. I’ve spent a lot of time in the last few days just thinking about what it will be like to have 2 kids. It has felt a bit like we are “having hydrocephalus” at times, and strangely somehow I almost forget to think about the fact that I will have 2 babies instead of one. The anticipation has set in…I was keenly aware today as I got Addie up and we went about our morning routine that it was the last time it will ever be like this again- just her and I in the quiet of the early part of the day. I know it’s probably overly sentimental, but it’s an amazing thing to bring a child into the world- to get to participate in a miracle- and it will redefine our family forever.

I also have to give a really special thank you to the men of the Lakewood Fire Department, for their generosity toward our family and for the brotherly love they have for my husband. Their support means so much to him, and in turn to me because of how valuable it is to him during this time. We are so very blessed to have them as a part of our lives.

Just a final note to thank everyone for praying so faithfully for our family and for Meghan over these months, and we would ask that you would continue to do so tomorrow as we head to the Cleveland Clinic for her birthday. Our surgery is scheduled for 7:30am, and we would ask that you would pray for a safe delivery for both of us. We will update everyone as soon as we can.

 Below are the lyrics to an old hymn that was dedicated to us in church this past Sunday. It reminds me that overwhelmingly, the Lord has been faithful to provide for all our needs both past, present and future. We continue to trust in his faithfulness to bring us through whatever may come in these next few weeks.

Great is thy faithfulness, O God my Father;
there is no shadow of turning with thee;
thou changest not, thy compassions, they fail not;
as thou hast been thou forever will be.

Great is thy faithfulness! Great is thy faithfulness!
Morning by morning new mercies I see;
all I have needed thy hand hath provided;
great is thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me!

Summer and winter and springtime and harvest,
sun, moon and stars in their courses above
join with all nature in manifold witness
to thy great faithfulness, mercy and love. 

Pardon for sin and a peace that endureth
thy own dear presence to cheer and to guide;
strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow,
blessings all mine, with ten thousand beside! 

Saturday, February 18, 2012

New Beginnings

Today was my last official day of clinical work (still have a couple of meetings to go to), but for all intents and purposes maternity leave starts NOW! We’ll see if this little girl gives me the next 11 days to get ready for her arrival.... Things are pretty much ready- the room is put together, my bag is mostly packed, and there are just a few things left to cross off the “deep cleaning” list I have going. I really just want to spend this last little bit of time I have with my first baby and let her know how special she is to me. It’s strange, but with all the mental adjusting I have had to do in light of Meghan’s diagnosis, I haven’t really thought much about what it’s going to be like just being a mom to two kids. Twice the challenge I am sure, but there will also be twice the love.
I am getting excited about meeting this little girl, and starting that chapter of our lives- the one as a family of four. Unexpectedly, it seems that a fresh start was the plan for the rest of my life as well. I was offered and accepted a position (still in ER) at a hospital that is 10 minutes from my house. It is a little anxiety provoking to think about starting a new job just a few weeks after having a new baby, but the offer came unexpectedly and was timed in such a way that I can only give God the credit for His provision. I will get to reclaim an hour and a half of my day that was spent commuting and give it back to my family. That is precious, precious time when you are a working Mommy.

We only have 2 more OB appointments left before delivery. Meghan continues to grow, and always scores well on her Biophysical Profiles (done by Ultrasound) that we have weekly. Her ventricles have continued to steadily increase in size, and we are confirmed for a C-Section from here on out due to the size of her head. The date is still set for March 1st unless she decides that earlier is betterJ The team of people taking care of the two of us has been fantastic and I can’t say enough good things about our care during the pregnancy.

This is likely my last post until she arrives. So far, this has been mostly about my journey over the last 20 weeks in preparing to be Meghan’s mom. Once she is here I hope to use this to keep everyone up to date on her progress, and our life as a family of four! Preparing for the unknown has proven to be difficult, but not impossible, and I am confident that no matter what happens we will get through whatever is ahead. I am so grateful for all the support, love, and especially prayer we have received from everyone over the last few months, and especially from the people who don’t even know us! I am confident that it is the reason I have been able to get through this time with a strength I cannot call my own. Thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart, and from the rest of our family as well. It’s a funny feeling to know with confidence that your life is about to change because of something that is both a miracle and a mystery all wrapped up in one tiny little life. Its time for a new beginning, and with His help, I’m ready.

“Forget the former things, do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up, do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland”. Isaiah 43:18-19